johnny 99 - bruce springsteen

Well they closed down the auto plant in Mahwah late that month
Ralph went out lookin' for a job but he couldn't find none
He came home too drunk from mixin' Tanqueray and wine
He got a gun shot a night clerk now they call'm Johnny 99

The world ain't getting better. Mankind ain't getting nicer. School ain't getting easier. But the Boss is as good as ever.

Too many thoughts spinning around in my mind, and too many carefully formed sentences left unspoken, alternatively just mentioned in haste and afterwards gone in the winds of time.

Hopefully to someone's joy, I'm back.

Yours as ever,
Snugglie

kom och dansa lite - mimikry

Hon tog på sig sin vitaste klänning
ställde sig vid spegeln och sa:
"Spegel, spegel på väggen där,

vem är vackrast i världen idag?"

Svaret blev lika som alltid,
"Kom tillbaka till mig nästa dag,

säg 'spegel, spegel på väggen där',
kanske du får det svar du vill ha

Spegel, spegel på väggen där,
vem är vackrast, säg är det jag?

Kom och dansa lite,
ja kom och dansa här med mig
jag vill dansa natten lång med dig min flicka


Last time I wrote I was whining, so now it's time to dig up the positive thinking. It's been an overly calm day this far, that's been spent with sleeping until 11:30 and then mostly cleaning.

Gotta say, that big window is a smaller odyssey to embark upon when cleaning. I don't know how close I've been to falling out, not to mention how many times.

The guy that designed those windows's got to be retarded though.

Anyhow, the day has as stated mostly been spent with cleaning. When actually settling down by the computer again and keeping on with my only existing hobby, gathering music, I happened to find a torrent containing Uppsamlingsheatet by Mimikry, which made me enter a frantic Mimikry-search.

It took me an hour or an hour and a half, but then I came to think of this song, that actually only was released in 50 examples. And well, not really released: Kom och dansa lite was thrown out in the crowd at a few randomly chosen concerts with Mimikry in 2006. It's downloadable from their web-page for only 5:- though, and now it's also available as torrent *hrm* at Oink's *double-hrm*.

No Maths's been done this far. Which sucks bad, but I'm working on it. Tomorrow'll be spent with Maths all through though. The whole day will be one long private Maths-lesson with my dad, or at least that's what I think. Well, the shit's got to be done.

When cleaning out my bag I happened to find a few notes that I made on a bus trip from Lund just a week or two ago. And since I've got the time, I'm now publishing it here; Enjoy.

Linje 6 070404 22:40
Man hinner observera mer än man ibland önskar som pendlare. Utöver att notera hur många lodisar och enligt populär benämning fjortisar som tar busen så brottas jag även med en rädsla att slita ut åsynen av solnedgången och likaså en lust att, så fort något yngel/kräk sätter sig längst bak i bussen (observera att jag allt som oftast sitter näst längst bak i bussen) och med sin flashiga och onödigt dyra mobiltelefon början spela den senaste gallan som spytts ut ur hip-hop/r'n'b-världen, slita ur dennes inälvor med ett aggressivt frustande om vad som egentligen är musik och sedan mata ovan benämnda yngel/kräk med tidigare nämnda inälvor till tonerna av "Killer Queen". För att inte tala om att det är rätt ohyfsat attmed ointellektuell blick och framtoning börja spela hög musik i en buss full av pendlare. Pendlare är människor under press. Och människor under press kan explodera.

Men utöver solnedgången och de okulturella kräk som vågar sig på mitt revir /Linje 6 Lund-Ystad) så får jag även tid att observera andra saker, de små detaljerna i vilka varje buss skiljer sig från andra. Klottret på sätena, mängden stoppning utsliten ur sätena längst bak, och allmäna skavanker. Till exempel så fattas på min favoritplats en stoppknapp på en buss, och på en annan plågas jag av ett defekt fläktreglage.

Nu har jag upptäckt ytterligare en sak. I ögonhöjf, vid i praktiken vartenda säte vid fönster, är det suddigt. Förnärmat undrar jag vad det är som stör min utsikt över alltifrån tomma fält till tomma byar till ett tomt Ystad och vid en nära inspektion visar det sig vara någon sorts fettig substans.

Med mitt inre öga kan jag se hur en morgontrött pendlare tillåter sig att sluta ögonen, för bara en liten stund, bara den där korta biten mellan Veberöd Öster och Dalby, och sedan förblir sovande tills bussan rullar in vid Universitetssjukhuset och den stackars saten tvingas springa till jobbet på Arkivgatan.

Bussarna är elakt utformade och inbjuder inte till sömn. Men om man har sådan tur att det inte sitter en storväxt luns bredvid en så kan man sitta lite snett och luta sig mot den vibrerande rutan, vilket inte fan är bekvämt, men man kan iallafall somna. Skånetrafikens bussar är på väg att vinna en Darwin Award för mest effektivt dödande av passagerare.

Hursomhelst, i våra upplysta tidevarv då en välsvarvad frisyr är ett steg mot framgång (liksom i fallet om du är kvinna, en välsvarvad häck) och vår sociala status avgörs av utseendet och utformingen av armar, ben och magar och, för kvinnorna tydligen både tuttar och armhålor så är det klart att man vill se proper ut på morgonen. Och om klockan är halv sex på morgonen så är det sälvklart att man om man suktar efter framgång har fettat in håret ordentligt med Garniers senaste klet innan man bordar den gula sardinburken varje morgon.

Och nu har hårvårdsproduktsförbrukningen (whoa, vilket ord!) nått så kritiska nivåer att jag endast kan se Konsum-skylten i Veberöd som i dimma. Uråldriga lager av hårvårdsprodukter skymmer min syn.

Vi har blivit lite som de där människorna i Jean M. Auels evinnerliga böcker.

"Hårvaxets folk".

Well, that's all I've got for you, my readers, for now. Leave me a comment, and I'll see you soon again, the weekend is short.

Cheers!


18:e balladen - lars winnerbäck

Javisst kan det va' hårt ibland
å kärvt å jävligt svårt ibland
Men när det väl blir bra
ja, så lycklig man kan va'!


Half a month and a little more since I last blogged. Guess that says much about my state of mind for the moment: I've got to get a grip of myself, and my studies. The school results might be slowly rising, I am to be completely honest not sure. It however has the cost that I don't really have time to blog anymore, since the little spare-time I actually have is spent either in Lund or on that bus that I've started to despise and sometimes hate (I'll come to that in a little while) or with friends, or alone with Ems.
.
And nowadays I'm thrown from overwhelming joy to pure sadness, and I think I can state with security that there are two major factors that have put me in this situation. The first one is, without doubt, the commuting. Hour after hour on a bus that doesn't seem to be going anywhere, hour after hour in an uncomfortable seat, and half of these hours spent in a way that feels totally wasted: to go back homewards, away from all that I enjoy and home to a place that is boring me to death, and which distance in between complicates everything.
Imagine, no matter at what time I end I will be home one and a half hour later, at the least. That is annoying, especially since these eternal busrides aren't very suitable for schoolwork due to bumpy roads and bad construction.
.
And well... I believe I don't even have to tell what a completely fucked up feeling it is to leave a movie-night at 2200 hours, then take the bus, be home at 2330 and have in mind that all others still are there, and according to all signs having a great time. Yes, that's right: I'm home before anyone else have left. No wonder one feels like shit when actually getting home, no wonder one have trouble sleeping some nights.
.
The other thing has emerged the last couple of days, but have escalated since November.
.
Mathematics. There are few words that I know of that can describe my situation in a good way. Fubar is one of the few expressions that actually works. Fucked up beyond all reason, that's how it feels.
.
Primarily I'm awfully pissed at myself for neglecting it the past half a year. Secondly I'm angry at the fact that I lack basics that I should have had. Thirdly I'm mad at ÖP for slowing down my development in so many ways in such a short time.
.
But most of all I'm scared. Scared of failing, simply. And not just the ordinary panic-panic that I'm not getting good grades enough or getting to few MVG:s; no, I am afraid of failing it. As it is now I don't even have a shot at Math B, I've only calculated half a chapter in the book.
.
It's my fault. Fuck all bad excuses, it's my fault for ignoring it and now I'm paying a bitter price.
I'm aiming at passing Maths. A G, and I'm happy. I can't achieve much more, any higher ambitions will suffocate me totally. That G is my salvation, because without it my whole world is falling apart. What about IB if I'd fail an exam? Dream on, farmer-boy.
.
Blesch, I don't want to think in those areas, but I can't help but do. If I'd fail I'm screwed in all ways possible, and even if not it's still painful to be so far behind. If there is anyone more than me this far behind I am very surprised. Not to mention that I'd consider that situation absurd.
Junior high gave me a bad impression of both my own and others capacity. From topping every class to being a good, but not best in a few subjects and simply lower half of the class in some subjects. And in Maths I guess that I simply am the bottom.
.
Yes, I'm counting it in prestige and that simply sucks. But hey, I'm getting used to the thought at least.
.
Wonderful Copenhagen tomorrow though. God and all other possible gods knows that I really need that. I need some rest, physically but above all, mentally.
.
I'll try to return to you as soon as possible.
.
Cheers!

en söt liten flicka - lars winnerbäck

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fat bottomed girls - queen

Hey listen here,
Now I got mortgages on homes
I got stiffness in my bones
Ain't no beauty queens in this locality (I tell ya!)
Oh, but I still get my pleasure
Still got my greatest treasure.
Heap big woman you done made a big man out-of me!

Now get this!

Oh, (i know),
you gonna take me home tonight (please)
oh, down beside that red firelight
Oh, you gonna let it all hang out
Fat bottomed girls you make the rockin' world go round
Fat bottomed girls you make the rockin' world go round
Get on your bikes and ride!

16 days. It's been 16 effin' days since I last updated. Honestly, that sucks. Well, I blame lack of motivation, lack of time, lack of sleep, and an overload of homework to cram in between school and the little spare time that I actually have got. Now I've got both time and a subject though, and thereby I return to the blog. I promise, or I at least hope that I won't stay away from it this long anymore.

Alas, the studies, yes... They are taking a lot of time now. And that's blasted, but what can I do?

Today: 8th of March. Two great happening are occurring on this day:
  • Me celebrating two months with Ems

  • International Women's Day

Not too much to say about first thing. Two months simply, and I met up with her a little earlier this morning. And I even miss her now, even though I saw her just a few hours ago. Well, in averagely 10½ hours I will see her again, and that's very good.

And to the next matter, the International Women's Day (I think that is the correct term for "Internationella Kvinnodagen"). And what is that?

Well, the International Women's Day, hereafter labelled as IWD for simplifying and saving my own energy is a day when women issues and equality between the sexes all over the world are to be given extra attention. I'm not sure if it's given as much attention in nations like e.g. India, Somalia, or why not USA, as in our very own Sweden. For some reason I doubt it. The Swedes are masters in the art to celebrate or recognize things that makes them feel responsible and good.

As you might have noticed if you're a regular reader of my texts, I'm not overly enthusiastic. I'm not bursting out of my shoes through the roof in order to levitate by pink clouds, which might be overly clear. And why? Why don't I want to celebrate a day for women, about women, and recognize all of their rights for one day and think extra of the big issues of equality?

One simple reason: Why would I? In what way would I be guilty to do that during this specific day?

I don't know about you other boys, guys and men out there, but at least I don't feel for being good against women during one day. A year according to the Gregorian calendar has got 365 of these. Shall the remaining 364 days remain as a patriarchy propaganda with women being oppressed?

Let's put it like this. I like women. Heck, I'm a heterosexual teenage guy. And I like one woman really much. A whole lot of my friends are girls, I'm talking to girls regularly and I can laugh just as much and well in the company of girls as in the company of guys.

I have never ever in my life treated someone in a different way because of their sex. And I doubt that I ever will (if I do, kick me: this doesn't include sarcasm, irony or cynicism, I want to spare my legs).

The IWD is in one way a big demonstration of the state of the feminism in the world. It's the women, and not the casual women but the rabid ones, the militant women that brings forward their aggressive messages. Men doesn't really have anything to say in the debate without getting labeled as either dictators, animals or lacking character.

Yes, now I am the one generalizing, but this text is mainly a way to show my opinion against the fanatical feminists that claims that men hit women, because it's in our nature. Wtf? In our nature? Come on. Is it then in women's nature to shop? No, it's something you choose. And no, I'm not putting an equality mark between these two, but note however: No woman in the world has a need somewhere deep in her mind to go shopping for loads of money. It's something they want to do, and something they might feel better by doing.

Men hitting women are basically the same thing. They hit women either because of the influence of some stim or drug, to feel better themselves, or simply because they feel for it. And of course they should have a few slaps in the face in order to wake up. Violence is never right unless when self-defending. The same goes for women hitting men though, that is neither more nor less justified, and anyone claiming the opposite should have a really good excuse for it.

I've also a few times heard the argument that "All men are pigs". When then kindly asking whichever girl it might have been why they think that way (don't ask me why they were talking to me at all if they would be correct) the answer is usually: "All that I have met have been that way, so I assume that all others are that way too." Is it really possible to say that without meeting all men in the world? I've only met one guy from Dalsland, and he was deaf. Does that mean that I can regard all guys (or people at all) from Dalsland as deaf? Of course not. get a grip of yourself, it's no good way to whine to proclaim the entire male population of the Earth as any sort of animal.

Yes, I might seem hostile, and I am. I am hostile at people treating other people in an unfair way because of sex, and for that part also religion, race, appearance or ethnicity, among other things. I despise people proclaiming the patriarchy, just as much as I despise the people that want women to rule the world and men to be the oppressed ones.

We are all humans for [insert word regarded as curse] sake. Is that so hard for parts of the world and its population to get?

All from me for this time.

Cheers!

Edit: After being informed by all-around English-pro David I have changed "International Women Day" into "International Women's Day". Thank you David, for contributing to a blog free from grammatical errors and typos.

we're gonna win - bryan adams

We're gonna win
Forget about a draw - were gonna score
And then we're gonna get a few more
Maybe another one just to be sure
Well make ya' look just like an amateur
Until the final whistle it's a war
And then were gonna pick ya off the floor
We wanna hear the crowd really roar
Ya - were comin, in were, gonna win, win!


There are a few songs that can be divided into the true cathegory of "Anthems". A magnum opus of a genre or a topic, a song that defines something only by its pure sound.

This cathegory is of course highly personal, the anthems are decided upon our own experiences. I, for example, associate Watching the Stars with the book The Shining, I think of a specific street on Jersey when hearing Working on the Highway or, to a smaller part, Wind of Change, and I associate the song Heaven with the love of my life.

But heck, some songs are self-written into the cathegory. Summer of '69 is the typical summer-song, so to say, and (Everything I do) I do it for you is simply one of those songs that nearly everyone at least have heard about, if not listened to.

Yes, I mention an awful lot of Bryan Adams, this lil' Canadian. Together with ice-hockey and maple syrup one of the best things that have ever popped out of the big womb of Canada. Guess it's an unusually cold womb, but if it's enough to create persons like Bryan Adams and Wayne Gretzky and... whoever more famous person there is from Canada that isn't a model nor a hockey-player, I guess that it's just fine like that.

And why do I mention him so much? Jeez, the man is the symbol of 80's-music! Just look at his haircut on the cover of Reckless, the man is an icon! And yes, I do happen to like his music a whole lot.

I spent yesterday at Em's place, after first breaking my bike and missing a bus (that came to the bus stop right when I left: by then, it was 12 minutes late), averagely the same time, missing a train in Malmö and waiting 40 minutes for the bus in Lund. As soon as I saw her though, I forgot about the fact that the sky was in a pale shade of grey and just enjoyed being alive. There's not much people that has that effect on me. She has though, and that's a reason to love her. Or maybe it is because I love her? All of a sudden my innocent little blog post has created a complicated query for me. That's probably bad.

Tomorrow I'm going to Denmark, more specifically Lalandia. Wonderful. Well, I've heard they've got somewhat good cafés there. That'll be nice. It's better than sitting home playing a malfunctioning Xbox or a computer with a video-card beyound saviour.

As you might've noticed if you're a regular reader of this blog, I guess you are around five persons, I haven't blogged in a while. This is due to either boredom, exhaustion, being away from the computer (in e.g. Södra Sandby) or spending time with trying to fully understand the phenomenon of torrents. I guess I still haven't realized their full potential.
The world is yours...

Well, I am off now in order to sleep. Because if I don't, it will be harder to get up. And then I will be cranky in the morning. And that might have other people being annoyed. After a while, I will be thrown of when driving outside of Copenhagen. And due to the cold weather, I'll get a cold. Then I won't be able to speak clearly, and have to whisper. And we all know that the one that whispers lies. And then I'll go to jail. And in jail I might get into bad business and doing drugs, and then I'll die.

So yes, I guess I should be off to sleep now.

Cheers, see you on Friday!

cruel town - broder daniel

Cruel town, it’s a cruel town
Cold people, cruel town
Cruel town, it’s a cruel town
If you fall, you stay down

Shitty day today. Boring day.
A Saturday that feels like a Sunday is bound to be bad. But however, except for cleaning and taking one heck of a walk I haven't done anything. Even the Xbox is messed up, now I remember why I haven't had the damned machine connected for half a year.
It doesn't get more encouraging that tomorrow seems to turn out the same. Blasted. Well, one good thing is at least that I might see Ems on either Monday or Tuesday, which is nonetheless awesome since I'm going to Denmark (Lalandia... yay) between Wednesday and Friday. Meeting her for a day would be balm for a bored soul, not seeing her for a week would be a smaller scale-hell.
However, I found something to do now; Sort my music. Yes, all of it. And then not just in the media library, but in the folders too. Example:

04_simon_and_garfunkel_overs-faf

Shall instead be:
Simon & Garfunkel - Bookends - Overs
All following the model of "artist-album-song(-track)". The last one is however not acknowledged by me since it's completely irrelevant.
1500 songs, at least. Might get fun.
Well, I am now off towards the telly in order to watch Star Wars - Episode III on PPV, to cheer myself up a bit.
Cheers!

the green fields of france - eric bogle

The sun's shining down on these green fields of France,
The warm wind blows gently and the red poppies dance.
The trenches have vanished long under the plow,
No gas, no barbed wire; no guns firing now!
But here in this graveyard, that's still no mans land,
The countless white crosses in mute witness stand,
To a man's blind indifference to his fellow man,
And a whole generation were butchered and damned

Aye, I'm getting both philosophish and hippieish now. Thereby more or less accidentally finding the eminent song of The Green Fields of France, originally written by Eric Bogle and masterly covered (slightly surprisingly) by Irishpunk-band Dropkick Murphy's. It's a song telling the tale about someone sitting by the grave of you Pvt. Willie McBride, that died at age 19 in the year of 1916, with the narrator of the song thinking about the young man's destiny and what might've happened to him. It's a beautiful song, and I advice you to get it. The Dropkick Murphy's version is the best one, so I advice you to get that.

The reason of my sudden change of mood, to philosophical from simply lazy and happy, is a movie I watched (sadly not the whole at the same time, but half yesterday and the rest today). I take for granted that you've all heard about it: Schindler's List, starring Liam Neeson and Ben Kingsley in the leading roles, and Ralph Fiennes as the most twisted German officer I've seen on screen. The movie itself, directed by the probably greatest director of our time, Stephen Spielberg, is nothing but a masterpiece.
The movie is based upon the true story of the German businessman and convinced nazi Oskar Schindler, that arrives to Kraków soon after the Germans have invaded Poland. With a good sense for making contacts and a brilliant sense for building up a business, even if it mainly means dealing over the responsibility to skilled sub-workers, he starts a factory using only Jewish workers: by that, he can pay them less. Their salaries goes to the SS, but the point to him is that they are cheaper than Polish workers.
As the story goes on Schindler is starting to doubt though, and the change of him as a person is the astonishing part of the movie. 198 minutes long, but that's 198 minutes of art, and nothing less. I won't give any more of the story, since I consider it everyones duty to watch it themselves as soon as possible. No discussion about it.
When I had finished watching the movie I was discretly sobbing and felt as if my eyes had been opened again, even though I've seen quite a few movies about the Holocaust and also have read a lot about it. That's the feeling you get when seeing something simply astonishing. However, after some thinking and listening to sweet ballads about peace and love and the Emerald Isle I feel resurrected, and I feel more for writing something hopeful, rather than grieving for a happening I can never affect, but only do my best to prevent from happening again.

Did you really believe them when they told you the cause,
Did you really believe that this war would end wars?
Well the suffring', the sorrow, the glory, the shame,
The killing and dying it was all done in vain.

After World War II there hasn't been any really big war (not counting civil wars and revolts in the USSR) or armed conflict on European soil, more than the wars in Yugoslavia. And in Yugoslavia it was mostly concerning the Balkan countries, until it started to get too much so that the United States of America took their responsibility and cleaned up. And with all due respect, I dare to claim that the major part of the Swedish population only were affected by the war through immigration to their hometowns.

I believe Europe is getting slightly spoiled and left out from the horrible things of the world, it almost feels a little unfair. Unfair in the way that people in general, I stumble across them everywhere, get more and more apathic when it comes to war and violence. "Conquer those, crush those, yada yada and smash those, they might get dangerous in the future".

Where's the morale in that?

Now, this was ages before my own birth, but I still wonder if Europe has escaped the clouds of the two World Wars, when our continent was turned in to a big, muddy battlefield, stinking of mustard gas.

Oh Willie McBride, it all happened again,
And again and again and again and again!

The battlefield has since been moved. The target for the worlds armed forces has been moved from Berlin to Baghdad, and the warning triangle from Moscow to Pyongyang and Tehran. All the time further away from Europe. All of a sudden the europeans, the ones that ages ago created a proud tradition of killing eachother has been the peaceful and civilized population of the world, and this only in a matter of a century or so.

And of course it's wonderful. I don't want to have to live to see soldiers' boots crossing the borders into my country, nor any other country in our vicinity. I want to see peace through my days and I want my children, and grandchildren to grow up in peaceful times. Of course it matters a lot for me.

But does it matter less to the rest of the world? Does it make any difference if you're Irani and have a nutjob dictator building nukes, or if you're Iraqi and probably will have to see your land fall apart in an armed conflict between militia and foreign armed forces, or if you're Korean and don't get any food, since the holy leader of your country is giving the bread to the army?

Does it make any difference at all?

Doesn't this illustrate the absurd thing in the western world taking responsibility for the rest through invading their countries, deposing their leaders without any plans on how to revive a working state? And as well the absurdity in young men and women joining the army to travel over half of the world to reach a battlefield, a hellhole where they are living with the risk of getting killed during both day and night, as well as morning and evening?

To continue with the subject I'd like to mention one of the most genial movie scenes I've seen: In the movie Fahrenheit 9/11 by Michael Moore that I also assume that all of you have heard about Moore is in one scene standing outside the Capitolium. He is dressed as a draftsman, and every U.S. Senator that walks past him is stopped, and encouraged to let his son join the army to fight for his land. To noone's surprise, none of them were to keen on it and Moore was eventually shoved away from the place.

Doesn't this say quite a lot? Everyone (well, let's say almost everyone) wants to get rid of all the injustice in the world and have everyone live freely and happily for the rest of their lives.

But noone (well, let's say almost noone) wants to send their son or daughter to fight for it. Not in a place from where bodybags are coming by the week, and increasing in numbers.

My point in this is that yes, of course we want freedom, both for ourselves and for others. The farther away it is though, the less it concerns us. And countries liberating/invading (I'll let you choose the term you see best fit) other countries can do so, as long as it doesn't interfere with our daily life and routines.
We can accept a battlefield in the other end of the world since we've forgotten, or are ignoring, the horror of how it once was here, in Europe, on our own home continent.
I will not change the world with this blog post, of course not. It will be read by at most 20 people, commented by a few, and then I'll write a new blog post tomorrow and the day after tomorrow and eventually this will just be another post among many.
But I'd like to remind you, reader, that this planet is ours, and ours only in the future. If many enough of us remembers it, we can one day get an end to pointless killing and illegitimate wars.

Cheers, and peace.

heaven - bryan adams

Oh - once in your life you find someone
Who will turn your world around
Bring you up when you're feelin' down
Ya - nothin' could change what you mean to me
Oh there's lots that I could say
But just hold me now
'Cause our love will light the way

Thursdays are nice. Lazy and only three lessons, and at least the first one is good.

Seems as if spring has decided to finally try to battle out the stubborn winter. Or well, today it seemed so for about half the day at least. It's funny, this weather thing, every second day it's bloody winter and the rest of the days it's sun and not warm, but warming at least.

Heck, the snow is melting away in Ystad at least. Not that it matters, since I try not to spend time here, but still.

Talking about Ystad. The upcoming weekend will be spent alone at home, without any company more than the telly and a bunch of movies (and a whole lot of junk-food that's been shipped in from ICA in order to grant my survival) and well... I'm not too thrilled. Nothing better to do though, since people are busy with moving and other for me totally useless things.

To conclude I would like to add that I today celebrate one month with Ems. One month... 31 days. Gee, it's gone by really fast. But that doesn't matter, since no matter how fast or slow it would have felt, it's still been the probably best month of my life.

Emma Karolina Engelin, I love you more than I can say.

<3


(P.s: The usual cheerful "cheers!" on the ending is today replaced by an imitation of a heart, made with computer keyboard. The author apologizes.)

watching the stars - brolle jr

We’re only watching the stars
Heaven’s gotta wait
another year, hold on to your visions tonight
We’re only watching a dream
Oh, paradise will wait
another year, hold on to your visions tonight

I would want to work my reason of blogging-absence on me being busy lately. I can't however, since I haven't been busy. You know, having the time, but not really the will or the inspiration. If you have will and inspiration you always find time for it.

I have spent quite much time away from home lately, more than usual. It's primo school and segundo hanging out with friends on the weekends, so I spend averagely four-five awake hours a day at home a week, not counting Sundays when I'm usually home and just trying to get time to pass.

To leave the subject of my Sunday apathy, since it's nothing of interest nor worth discussing, once again want to mention that wonderful feeling of all of a sudden finding an old favourite song. When surfing around randomly, this was before all of a sudden clouds came from nowhere only to drop some white shite over the town (yes, it's been snowing again) I looked out my window and looked at the stars a little. All of a sudden it struck me, as lightning: Watching the stars! What was the reason that I hadn't been listening to that totally wonderful song for ages? I didn't find any answer, and thereby I downloaded it.

Now, a few of you might appoint me a terrible clod for downloading something that I now can reveal that I actually have on CD, but alas, I have my reasons.

Watching the stars happens to be the best song that Brolle's made. Thereby I of course want to share it with people I know, and the problem here is that most of them don't use Windows Media Player. They usually have the blasphemic program of iTunes (don't worry, I'm just kidding with you) and thereby it isn't possible for them to play .wma-files. And here comes the problem, if you rip a record into the computer via WMP you get them in .wma.

Thereby I downloaded Watching the stars, and the rest of the record, Paradise will wait, was ripped in good old spirit. Tracks like Sound of a drum, Hush Little Baby and Growing up too fast are tracks that actually makes me happy, I've got some memories from when listening to them. It isn't any masterpiece, it isn't Queen, but it's a good artist that gets me at least slightly nostalgic.

And now for something completely different, as John Cleese said before his desk exploded:
It's a jubilee! This is my 100th blog-post.

Yes, I believe I can count as a slight nerd because of that. Not that it would matter: The blog isn't really an online-diary for me, nor is it some specialized blog-crap that at least 50 people already are covering: No, it's my place for writing down my thoughts and such, mostly in order to keep the writing going. I'm happy with that though, and I'm grateful for the comments that I've gathered lately, it's nice to hear people's opinions.

I actually had a smaller thought with the choosing of opening song today see, on my way home form the bus stop I was biking as usual, listening to Sailing to Philadelphia by Mark Knopfler and James Taylor, and I happened to look upwards.

And the sky, the sky... Stained with stars, deep navy blue with bright-shining stars everywhere. I actually forgot that I was on my way home to a well-earned dinner after a relatively long day, and instead just stopped at the fork of the road. Still looking up, still unaware of the rest of the world.

That's the dangerous thing with the stars, when looking at them it's hard to let your eyes concentrate on a more relevant and conrete goal. I simply don't want to, when watching the stars I can dream away as far and much as I want. The longing for the unknown and unexplored is something that never will stop fascinating humanity, I'm convinced of that. It's our curiosity that has kept us alive for so long.

I think I stood there for ten minutes. My mp3 ran out of battery without me noticing it, and I got quite surprised when i noticed. I've got to have been really gone. I got up on the bike again (I had gone of it and stood by a tree instead, that also wihtout really remembering doing so) and biked home to get a good nice dinner of pancakes and bacon.

I don't think that anyone walked by. If they did they saw a dreaming young boy, watching the night-sky with longing eyes and a for every minute brighter mind.

Cheers!
 

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